Early Call On Chicago

25/11/10 -- A pretty confident unchanged across the board is the early call for this afternoon.

For all you horse racing fans out there, have you ever noticed that on days when we are open and Chicago is closed, it's a bit like when all the proper race meetings are off. You have to make do with the all weather from Southwell, or even worse Walthamstow dogs. Or even worse than that the stupid "virtual" racing that they have these days.

Who on earth would bet on that I'll never know. Hang on a minute, yes I do, my mate Kieran. He likes a bet does Kieran, and he also sadly suffers from a medical condition that means he never wants to be too far away from a lavatory, without going into too many details.

Well he went down to London with a gangs of mates once and surprisingly they all decided that it would be a sensible thing to do to go out on the lash. When they awoke in the morning at the flat where they were all crashing one of the girls involved had decided to run herself a bath (the very cheek of it). She refused to come out of it even to allow Kieran to see to, what was to his mind some very pressing business.

So resourceful Kizzer decides to pop over the road to William Hills and dispose of his brown paper parcel using their facilities. Being a gentleman as well as a scholar of course Kieran couldn't bring himself to simply bowl in and leave Efan Ekoku behind him so to speak, without at least using their other facilities as well.

So he quickly put a bet on all they had to offer at that time in the morning, the virtual racing from "Hilltop Gardens". One, seven and thirteen are Kizzer's lucky numbers so he rattles off a quick tricast on those and settles down to complete the remainder of his mission.

You can probably guess the rest if you've stuck with the story this long, as Kizzer leaves the shop both a couple of pounds lighter and also several hundred pounds heavier.

He is ginger though, so he doesn't have things all his own way.